My Attachment Theory

Before we had Lily, Tim would often jokingly say, "I hope our kids like me." I would always reassure him that of course they would love him; he's their daddy. I guess I knew and hoped that the same would be true for me, their mommy, but I had no idea how incredible it would feel and how early on in Lily's life I would be able to experience this attachment. For the first 6 weeks or so of her life, Lily cried a lot. The only thing that seemed to consistently soothe her was feeding her. I felt so inept when I couldn't comfort her by holding her, singing to her...didn't she remember my voice?

Now when she cries and I pick her up, she stops. She rests her head on my shoulder. She takes those shuddering deep breaths that come after crying and is comforted. Mommy is here. Mommy is here. And I get to be the mommy! She smiles when I talk to her, giggles when I tickle her, and loves to hear "You Are My Sunshine". I didn't think she would be so aware of me until she was older, but I am so glad she is.

Sometimes it feels very overwhelming to be so much for this dependent little person. But the rewards! Oh the rewards...that little head on my shoulder, that smile, those fingers clasped around one of mine...those make every day a good one.