Watching my family with Lily was such a treat this Christmas. It was especially fun watching my younger siblings, Jamie (8), Emma (9), and Ralphie (11) with her, since they were my "babies" when I was in high school and college.
This Christmas was also really special because I got to see both of my parents' families. This doesn't usually happen as my mom lives in Northern California and is a 14-hour drive from my dad's house in Pasadena. In spite of my parents being divorced and remarried, they are wonderful about coming together for some blended family time for us kids. I wish that my brother, Chris, and his wife Cindy could have been there. Here are some of my favorite pictures of my family with Lily.
To all of my good friends that live in cold places and comfort themselves with the mantra, "But it's not Christmas without snow," I hate to tell you this but...yes, yes it is. I thoroughly enjoyed spending part of my Christmas in the pool in Palm Springs.
I promise the Christmas spirit was just as alive and well at 65 degrees as it would have been in 10 degrees.
Tim, Lily, and I went to our friends' house the other night. They have a 3-year-old, a 6-year-old, and the wife is due very soon with their third little boy. They were so excited to have Lily over and wanted to hold her and show her all their toys. I think they were slightly disappointed that Lily couldn't play and talk back to them.
At one point, Lily started to get fussy and hungry, so I pulled out my handy dandy nursing cover, and modern woman that I am, started to nurse Lily in their living room. Those two little boys had no idea what was going on, especially the 3-year-old.
"Why are you hiding her?" (As he tried to lift up the nursing cover to see what was going on)
"I don't think she's really eating under there."
"Why is she crying? I think she doesn't want to eat anymore." (As I'm attempting to switch sides)
"I don't think she likes being under there. I'm going to give her my orange car because that's her favorite color." (Again trying to lift the nursing cover)
At one point the 6-year-old came over, nodded wisely and said, "Oh, she's drinking milk, isn't she." This only confused the 3-year-old further because he could not figure out where this milk was coming from.
"Where's the milk?"
Poor little guy's going to get a real anatomical education when his little brother arrives. I just didn't have the heart to tell him the truth.
to be exact, it's -13 with wind chill. This means it's probably not a good idea to take the baby out. We are sitting in the house all day, which might not be so bad if, while the baby's napping, I could look outside through our windows. Thanks to my bark-happy dog, those blinds are shut so as not to tempt Dirk to bark at a passing car while Lily is trying to get her nap on. Staying inside all day makes me notice every speck of dust, any items out of place, and of course the ridiculous amount of cat and dog hair that is everywhere in spite of my cleaning efforts. Also I have been particularly focused on Dirk's problematic dandruff today - it's really grossing me out. I gave him a bath, in our bathtub (remember the -13 degrees?), which means there is now dog hair all over our bathroom. Too bad. Better post next time, I promise.
Our friends Jess and Jon had their beautiful baby girl, Olivia Jasmine. She and Lily are about a month apart. They got to meet for the first time this week. Unfortunately by the time I got the camera out, poor Olivia was not making her happiest face.
If you want to have some fun with my husband some time, get him talking right as he's falling asleep but trying really hard to pretend he's not asleep. Crazy things will come out of his mouth. Tim, his sister Ashleigh, and his mom (not sure if any of the other sibs or Greg do this?) all do this thing where, if you wake them up, then ask if they were sleeping, they will lie and say they weren't. It's not like they're liars (well, Tim kind of is), it's just this knee jerk reaction.
One of my favorite conversations with Tim happened one night when we were getting ready to go to sleep. I thought he was still awake and asked him if he would read scriptures with me (we try to do this every night). Here's what unfolded:
Me: Will you read tonight?
Tim: Jinx.
Me: (Pause) I don't understand how that's a jinx.
Tim: Double jinx.
Me: How did you jinx me, I don't get it. Are you awake right now?
Tim: Oh, I thought I just jinxed you really good.
Just in case you didn't know, a "jinx" is when you and someone else say the same thing at the same time - then the first person to say jinx has to say your name five times before you can talk again, or something like that.
Last night I thought he was reading and said something to him, I can't remember what, but he responded with, "Don't make me eat organic food." Um, ok I won't, but where do you come up with this stuff?
When we were first married and living in Utah we had these neighbors whose stupid ridiculously loud car alarm would go off at all hours of the night. It woke me one night and I said, "I am going to call the police." Tim's solution? "I'm calling a saber toothed tiger."
Lately our dog, Dirk, has been making me a little crazy. Everyone keeps asking how Dirk is with the baby - he's actually great with the baby. Aside from the fact that he wants to lick her in the face a little too much, he's very gentle with her and gets very concerned when he hears her cry. I will let you imagine how annoying it is to hear the dog whining combined with Lily crying. In a word: ANNOYING. Anyway, I need one more reason why we should keep him. I figure I should at least have five good ones so that when Tim comes home with offers for potential new homes for Dirk I can hold out.
1. Pride. I decided when we first started acquiring animals that we would not get animals only to get rid of them when they became inconvenient. I don't have anything against people that have done this, in fact, I completely understand why someone might want to give up their hyperactive Weimeraner. I just promised myself that I wouldn't do it.
2. Protection. Dirk barks at the neighbors across the street when they close the gate to their backyard. Sometimes he barks at passing cars. Sometimes I swear he barks at nothing just to piss me off and wake up the baby (hard to tell). BUT, Dirk barks, and he has a big tough bark that sounds like he's going to eat rather than lick your face off. This makes me feel safe, especially when our neighborhood does not seem to always be the safest.
3. Love. Ok, I do love my dog. The other day I took him to the park with Lily, my friend, and her little boy. We were the only ones in the park so I let him off leash, and he grabbed the biggest stick he could find and pranced around to his heart's content like some idiotic oversized deer...and it made me laugh. I don't know if you can fully appreciate that if you haven't seen Dirk prance.
4. He's a really nice dog. Even the five vet techs that have to muzzle Dirk and wrestle him to the ground in order to clip his stupid nails agree...he's a sweetheart. He's just very big, and very, very dumb. Heart of gold, though.
5. I need your help, friends, to come up with number 5. Yes, Chelsea, even you.
This is Dirk with his "party ears" on, as Tim calls them.
Dirk guarding my mom and Lily.
"Why did you have a baby? Wasn't I enough work for you?"
"You can't tell me what to do, you're not even my real mom!"
This one cracks me up. I'm pretty sure I make this face.
So very mad that my finger was on the flash when I took this picture, because her smile just kills me in this one. Every baby needs a kimono, right Auntie Alison?
I don't know if this really happens, but you know how in the movies they show the movie director with the little black chalkboard or whatever it is naming the scene they are filming and then saying, "Take one!"? Well, I would like someone following me around during my day and doing that. For example, we quite often have, "Changing diaper, take one!", only to be followed by "Changing diaper, take two!" as she squelches into the fresh diaper I just put on her. This is not as bad as a "Changing diaper, take one!" followed by a "Oh no, she's still pooping now that the diaper is off, take one!". We often have many takes of "Trying to leave the house", which may include takes where we change a diaper again (after I just buckled her into her car seat) or curse the dog who has pushed past me out of the house and is now refusing to get back in the house because he thinks he is coming with us. The most frustrating takes are when we have "I finally got her asleep and down for her nap and am just beginning to eat breakfast, brush my teeth, go to the bathroom, and shower at 11 am" and then she is awake 10 minutes later. Then it's "Down for a nap" takes 2, 3, 4...
It makes me really grateful that I get to stay at home with this little one and that I don't have a husband who comes home and says, "Seriously, what have you done today", as I'm in the midst of "Catch up on sleep, take five!".
My baby will be one month old on Wednesday, can you believe it? It is still so unreal to me that this little girl is ours, and that she was in my tummy up until a month ago.
This weekend my step mom Lisa came into town, and we had a great time doing nothing but drool over Lily. I think when people compliment your baby you're probably supposed to say, "Thank you", instead of, "I know", but I can't help it. Now that she's not inside of me I don't feel like I can take a whole lot of credit for how precious she is. Therefore I don't feel the need to be modest. When we did get out this weekend and people would ask if she was my baby it still felt so surreal to say yes.
I can stare at her for hours. I love to watch her little face as she sleeps and hear the funny little noises she makes. She's sleeping in a pack 'n play in our room right now, and there's something about having my whole little family in one room that is so special to me.
Last week we had Lily's two week check up and she had not gained as much weight as the doctor would have liked, so we had to go back in today. I should have relaxed and known that Lily does things on her own timetable, kind of like coming one week late. The doctor said she likes to see babies gaining 5-7 ounces a week and Lily gained 10 ounces this past week, so for now we are in the clear. She's now 8 pounds 13 ounces of soft, yummy smelling baby-ness.
I love watching Tim with Lily. Today he came home from school and she was napping on our bed next to me. He looked at her and said, "She is so adorable." I nodded. "I'm going to love her forever." Yes, yes we are.
We had to get the three generations shot with my mom, Lily, and I. My mom kept us from going crazy the first week of Lily's life and even stayed longer than she had planned. We were so grateful for all her help and wished she could have stayed longer.
1) Kill my dog for waking the baby that I had just spent 3 hours rocking and nursing to sleep.
2) Take the screaming babe to the mall to buy a noise machine.
Killing my dog seemed like a lot of work so I went to the Brookstone at the mall to get a noise machine like the one we have in our room.
The lady at the cash register kept asking me, in a million different ways, if I wanted to buy the optional warranty. I kept telling her "No", in the same way, so as to be consistent, easy to understand, and VERY CLEAR.
And yet she kept asking. At one point I wanted to grab her by her wearable massage vest, pull her across the register, and give her a real close look at the bags underneath my eyes. I would then have pointed to the item I was buying: AN INFANT SLEEP MACHINE, and to my now peacefully sleeping 2 week old in her stroller. I think that would have helped her understand. Instead I practically shoved my debit card in her face with a very fake smile, AFTER she asked me if I wanted to buy the stupid digital clock by the register.
Please.
Don't.
Mess.
I will post more pictures later - the camera's in the baby's room, and the baby is sleeping, so there's no way I'm going in there.
I was going to be induced on Wednesday, September 30th, at 6 am. On Tuesday I woke up at 4 am with light but consistent contractions. I couldn't sleep through them so I got up and started cleaning the house, which I had been planning on doing that day anyway to get ready for Lily's arrival the next day. As Tim left for school I asked if he could come home early just in case these contractions turned into labor. He came home around noon; I was starting to have some stronger contractions, but not enough to go to the hospital. We went for a walk, watched some movies, and every so often I would bounce on our exercise/birthing ball or try different positions to get through a contraction. I talked on the phone to Tim's mom and she said she could tell I was having a contraction because it sounded like I was trying to talk while holding my breath.
At 8:30 pm on Tuesday night I called my doctor. I knew I wasn't going to be able to sleep that night through the contractions but still felt they weren't strong enough to warrant going to the hospital. I wanted to see if I could be induced that night rather than waiting for the following morning. My doctor gives out her home number to her patients and I felt really dumb calling her, but was reassured after talking to my friend Katie - her three children were delivered by the same doctor. My doctor asked what my contractions were like, and I said I could still walk and talk through them, but that they were very consistent, no more than 5 minutes apart or so. She told me to wait until they got more intense and then go to the hospital.
Around 11:30 pm I decided it was time to go. I could still work through the contractions using different laboring positions (all very attractive, I must say - nothing like a 9 months pregnant woman rocking while squatting), but I wanted to see where I was. Tim had already taken Dirk over to our wonderful friends' house, so the pseudo child was taken care of. The cat had food and water. We had a bunch of funny movies borrowed from our friends Tim and Anna. I had eaten as much as possible while at home since I knew they wouldn't let me at the hospital. My house was clean (now it kind of looks like Babies R Us exploded in my living room). We were ready.
I was admitted at 12 am on the dot. They hooked me up to monitors to see how my contractions and baby's heart rate were doing. I did not love having to sit in bed through the contractions - I wanted to keep moving. They had me stay on them for 15 minutes, then let me walk around the unit with Tim. By 1 am the contractions were getting much more intense, and would sometimes come in triples - three strong contractions, right on top of each other. I felt fine in between the contractions as long as I was able to move around, but once I started getting those triples, I was done. "And now I would like my epidural."
Ironically the anesthesiologist was the only person that I had a slightly negative experience with. Mid-contraction he was asking me if I had any history of health problems, and I said, "No", but I guess he couldn't hear me. He then said, "Um, can you listen right now?" Really? I'm having a contraction! Anyway, I was dosed by 2:30 am and much more comfortable. I was checked shortly after and was dilated at 5-6 cm. Labor continued to progress well without me doing much other than watching hilarious movies with Tim (think anything with Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Will Ferrell), sleeping, oh and throwing up all that tasty food I'd eaten before.
By around 6 am I was at 9 1/2 cm, and baby's head was "right there", according to our wonderful delivery nurse. Unfortunately my doctor was not right there as she had a surgery at 8 am and would probably not be there until 8:30 am. Around 7:30 am they broke my water and I was at 10 cm, having some urges to push but trying to hold out for our doc. During this entire time, Lily's heartbeat was very steady and regular - the nurse said her tape looked like it came out of a textbook. This was so reassuring to me - Lily was coming into the world on her own time and wasn't too worried about it.
When my doctor came in at 8:30 my contractions had slowed some and I wasn't having any urges to push, so I was started on some Pitocin. A little after 11 am (and more sleeping, and more puking, and watching Blazing Saddles, and the nurse joking that I was going to "laugh this baby out"), the party started. I pushed for about 25 minutes and got to see my daughter. And she was huge to me! I could not get over her head of brown hair, either. Who would have guessed I would have an 8 lb 3 oz baby. My doc had estimated she was 7 and a quarter the week before.
The recovery was a little more difficult than the labor and delivery, partly because I was RAVENOUS and they wouldn't let me eat until I got to our recovery room, but my blood pressure kept dropping and I felt like I was going to pass out or throw up every time they tried to get me in the wheelchair. Finally they got me on a cart and into the recovery room and I had some bites of my long-awaited breakfast and...I threw up all over myself, AGAIN. That was sad.
The next two days were so sweet and wonderful though - Tim and I were able to focus on this beautiful little baby that had joined us. The whole experience was so incredible - it's difficult for me to sum it up in a word, or even words. We are so grateful that everything happened exactly as it did and that our little Miss Lily is here.
