Spontaneous - and how I'm not, but I try to be

Yesterday was one of those days where getting legitimately "ready" for the day - showering, blow-drying hair, putting on deodorant (kidding!), makeup - seemed like way too much work. Probably because in order to shower I have to remove the toilet plunger, the toilet brush, the trash can, and the toilet paper roll from the bathroom. Then I have to pile a bunch of toys in the bathroom in the hopes that Lily will be entertained by them. Then I get to amuse Lily by pounding back on the shower door when her little hands, and sometimes face, come over to try to figure out what the heck mommy is doing in there.

I was all set to head out to Target and Five Guys after to meet Aunt Wendy in my awesome St. George Triathlon sweatshirt (which asks, "DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES?), sweat pants, and running shoes. No makeup. Nasty hair. It was a good look, but then I felt bad for Wendy having to sit with me so I took the sweatshirt off and put on my track jacket with the bleach stain (ahhh much better!) and put on some makeup. I kept on the Elroy Half Marathon shirt which is a lovely lime green and advertises the apple dumpling you get at the end of the race. Nothing but class, people, nothing but class.

So Wendy and I are enjoying some delicious burgers, and Lily in particular is ecstatic that her lunch consists of only beef and potatoes (really, it was the happiest she'd been all day), and I was maybe whining a little bit. Tim was going out of town to Phoenix for a conference. I wanted to go too but didn't feel like driving the round trip of 12 hours with Lily for just a day's worth of Phoenix, and Tim's sister Ashleigh wasn't even going to be in town. Waaaahhh what a hard life I have. Not really at all. Anyway, I promise I wasn't fishing for this, but Wendy then offered to watch Lily for the next two days so that we could go.

I had to pause.

I had never been away from Lily for more than 6 hours. I had NEVER left her overnight. Usually doing something like this would have taken weeks of mental preparation and repeated self-assurances that it's going to be ok. Because it's not like I don't trust Wendy. She's the best! I had no doubt Lily would be in great hands and have a good time. No, of course it's the extra crazy things that come to mind. Tim and I are totally going to die or be horribly injured while away from her! And all because I thought a little time by myself would be fun. Selfish, selfish Mommy!

I told her I would think about it. Then I remembered my other child: Dirk! I can't leave! No one wants to take care of Dirk! He's a total pain! But then Cameron said he'd take care of Dirk. I was running out of excuses. I texted Tim with the news that we could get away together! What did he think? He wasn't able to respond. Clearly he didn't want me to come. Yep, I should just stay home. After all I had made big plans! A movie night! A run with a friend!

How did I become this person so paralyzed with anxiety? I resolved to pack. Packing wouldn't hurt anything and I could always unpack. I packed Lily and Dirk up. Dirk of course picked up on the anxiety and followed me around, stressed, nosing at his treats in a bag. Lily pooped instead of taking an afternoon nap. Sigh. Then she watched the Signing Times DVD ummm maybe 4 times in a row while I continued to prepare. I was really going to do this. I was going to be spontaneous. I can't complain, I reasoned, when I was given the opportunity to get away for a little bit.

So here I am, in Phoenix, the day stretched ahead of me to fill however I want.

Thanks so much to Wendy and Cameron. See you on Saturday, Lily-girl!

Dirk...maybe Cameron will adopt you.

I Promise That My Baby Smiles

It's just a little tricky to capture it on camera sometimes. She is almost always super happy when she wakes up in the morning.

This is from our walk this morning. She is very into pointing right now.

Siblings.

Halloween 2010

My friend Jess requested cute Halloween pictures and stories of Lily. We got a couple of cute pictures, but Lily wasn't really that into Halloween this year. We went to a fun party on Saturday night, but she was pretty tired. She's teething and getting over a cold, which means mom and dad were pretty tired too.

I had planned to take her around the neighborhood on Sunday night to trick or treat a little, but she was in bed by 6:45. Then she slept in this morning until 8:30. That's a nice story, if not a cute one. Anyway, here's the little unsmiling peacock.

Yah, awesome windblown hair, I know.

Here's my Prince Charming all decked out for his work theme. Check out the sweet costume Aunt Wendy made. I feel like we should blow this up poster-sized and put it in his operatories with the caption, "Together we can defeat tartar!" Perhaps this is why we have a professional interior decorator for his office.

A Plan

Tim and I have a plan.

It may or may not involve poisoning our neighbors' dogs (on either side of our house).

We may or may not have already worked out how we will deny that we had anything to do with it.

We will probably use dog treats, peanut butter, and a large amount of roach killer, since that's what we have on hand. Also, when the police come to question us, we'll be able to show legitimate reasons why we have all the supplies. I've learned from mystery novels. You can't make any suspicious purchases close to the time you kill your neighbors...ahem, neighbors' dogs.

The only reason we've worked this out is because these dogs bark ALL THE TIME. There are two on each side.

My dog practically never barks outside.

No really, it's true.

Do you know why? He's too busy following me around the house, from room to room, making me CRAZY.

* I know Patti and Sandy from the Milwaukee VA (shout out!) are reading this right now and having a cow. Don't worry ladies, I solemnly swear no dogs were killed (or even beaten) as a result of this post.

Sometimes I Freak Out

Sometimes I freak out and I can't take out the trash at night because there are clicking bugs in the trees. I can hear them clicking and I don't know what they are but I'm pretty sure they are going to drop in my hair, crawl down my shirt, and EAT MY FACE OFF. I know that could happen so I make Tim take out the trash.

Sometimes I freak out when we go to the library and even though it doesn't look that clean I think, hey, I'll be the cool, laid back mom, and I let my baby crawl on the floor. And then when she's crawling on the floor she goes to move a book, and a roach crawls out! Then I really freak out and I scoop her up and we run back to the car, and of course she isn't wearing shoes and before I can get out the hand sanitizer her hands and feet are in her mouth. Then I really really freak out because for sure, my baby is covered in roach eggs.

Sometimes I freak out when, a couple of days after Tim and I looked up stuff about roaches crawling in people's ears (no I don't remember why we did this), I feel this weird thrumming in my ear and I am now positively convinced that I have a roach in my ear. If that makes you not want to hang out with me, I understand. I'm kind of freaking out right now anyway.

Balloon Fiesta

It was cold.

It was dark.

It was earlier than I like to be conscious.

It was worth it.

There was something for everyone. A cow for my Wisconsin friends.

New Mexico pride.

For my VA friends.

And for the Star Wars fans.

Ok, maybe there wasn't anything for the Coke product fans.

Cami and Billie.

Grandma Batt, me, Cami, Billie, Kathy

And for the Milwaukee friends, remember cute Miss Brynn? I got to go to the Balloon Fiesta with her one night, but we didn't get to see much because the weather turned foul. But here she is, in her last year of her ER residency!

Party Rauch-Style

We were lucky enough to have some of Tim's family out for the Balloon Fiesta, including his parents, his Grandma, Cami, Billie, Ashleigh, Kyle, and the Wells family. We had a sweet quadruple birthday party for Lily, Ashleigh, Cami, and Billie. We appreciate all the driving and traveling that everyone did to get here, but I think the award for "Worst Trip To Albuquerque" goes to Ashleigh, who threw up several times on her way here due to being sick, and all on her birthday, too. I decided that for this year at least, October 8th should be renamed: Ashleigh's Barfday.

Me with birthday girls Billie and Cami.

Tim's cousin Lindsey came with her husband and kiddos from Logan, Utah.

Lily never hugs anyone else like this. She adores her cousin Billie.

Grandma Batt, Billie, Cami.

Lisa, Cameron's cute date to the party (who so kindly put together Lily's new playset with Cameron), Cameron, Timbo

What would a birthday party be without some trauma? Lily checking out this penguin, which bounces back at ya when you hit it.

Trying to get it away from her.

"It keeps coming back! No matter what I do, it keeps coming back!" Don't worry, we're doing exposure therapy with the penguin so that she can play with it one day. Today we looked at it while Lily sat in my lap and clung to my neck. We'll forge ahead.

You've been waiting for these.

Going in for the kill.

She definitely still has some chocolate frosting up her nose, and Tim was concerned at first that she was going to suffocate.

Blissed out.

Aunt Wendy

Paige and Jack kindly helped Lily open her presents. They were very sweet with Lily the entire time and Lily loved the attention.

Getting tired - so much partying!

Grandma Batt, Billie, Cami, Ashleigh, Kathy, Lily, and of course, Tim.

Grandma Rauch, just checking to see if Lily's still uber-flexible.

Aunt Ashleigh, even when sick, is always willing to share her iPad with the kiddos. Lily was busy on the drawing app.